"Yeah..he screws girls but it doesnt make him less of a friend to me =/"
"I rather not be friends with people who take sex so lightly."
"You can possibly tell me that...you treat your guy friends differently after they'd screwed girls?"
It left a mark on me. I thought about it further. Pondering the question in my mind.
Would I treat them any differently?
Sexual intercourse should always be performed when a woman and a man are already under the sanctity of marriage.
Sure, you can say things like "you're so old fashioned" or "there's no harm in sleeping around" but I will not let the depravity of society these days change the very values our forefathers had fought with blood, sweat and tears to instill.
However, would you, totally on the fact that this person has fornicated, cut off ties with a person?
I come from a background where teenage promiscuity run rampant among our peers. I've seen couples kissing, deflowered virgins, guys boasting about their late night conquests, girls crying after being told that their pregnant, etc.
So, I should be okay with it by now right? This nonchalant attitude towards intimacy?
I still surprise myself by the fact that I'm still not comfortable with it.
Call me narrow minded, conservative, prude, whatever, but at the end of the day, my morals still are as concrete as the day my mum told me about the God's wrath towards adulterers.
My friend recently told me that he wasn't a virgin. He had slept with one of the many whores in his college.
I continued to entertain the whole conversation, laughing and making jokes when secretly, I felt sad that this friend that I trust had decided not the give himself to only one person, the one who he will marry.
Will I treat him differently?
Absolutely not.
Perhaps one of the reason is because I've accepted the fact that he's not a religious person early in the friendship and I already half suspected him of being a person who views sex as a casual activity.
However, it's the least suspecting people, the mummy's boys, the sweethearts, the angelic stereotypes that have imprinted themselves in your mind that will shake the very foundation of what you believe in.
I was also told recently that one my childhood friends had slept with her boyfriend whom she is now no longer with.
This girl was one of the sweetest, most delicate things I've ever known and to imagine her being this carnal lolita between the sheets is simply mindboggling.
I was genuinely disheartened for her, a feeling still lingering until today.
Had I been there, could've I stopped her?
Could've I been a better friend, a better role model?
Friends come and go. It's the things we do that will keep our memory alive among everyone we know. Do we really need them to remember us as the "whore", the "slut", the "player?"
So,
Will I avoid my non virgin friends? No.
Will I love them less? Perhaps.
Will I be hurt by their actions? Most definitely.
Will I pray for these people who have wronged God and themselves?
InsyaAllah.
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