Habis Madu, Sepah Dibuang.

I think every Malay-speaking, hormone filled teenage girl was warned repeatedly about dating, with this saying naturally taking its place in the most overused phrase *other than "jangan pula perigi mencari timba", another annoying saying that seemed to plague our pride laden society*

To those who know me, I used to be rather Malay impaired *Yes, I have this weird pseudo American accent, blame MTV* but coming here, being surrounded by people who take pride in speaking Malay, I have indulged and embraced further speaking my mother tongue and have been immersed one of the many things that make Malay so rich in culture: Peribahasa.

This particular one strikes a chord in all our hearts doesn't it?

The ultimate fear that if one lead a social life wild enough, the repercussions will great enough to leave us unwanted by the opposite sex.

As crude as any saying might go, we can paraphrase this "peribahasa" into something simpler;

Nobody wants used goods.

... or in society, this means girls who have been with other boys *may it be physically or emotionally.

Ah, I have such an enormous bone to pick with society on this one.

I don't condone sexual freedom, just keep your debauchery to yourself...

But, I really have to ask to all those men out there:

What is your problem?

Is it not bad enough that you've been with a girl and not taken responsibility over her current stigmatized status, escaping scot free when in fact it takes two to tango? Need you label the promiscuous, punish the lewd, verbally whip the unchaste while sitting on your high horse?

Why is it so easy to forget the immorality you've shared and be so quick to judge and snicker at those crestfallen harlots you now call them?

Why is it so easy for you to move on?

We shed tears for you.

We put our trust in you

We gave ourselves to you, mind, body and soul

We promised our hearts to you

We held your hand when you are at your weakest

... And you expect us to just accept it when you toss us aside and move on to your next wide eyed victim?

And you, this is why religion preaches abstinence and boundaries, the same religion you were brought up in and now have abandoned, it's to protect us women from bastards like you, from slander, from being hurt and from being another notch on your bedpost.

But you know what, I have one more thing to offer you: my sympathies and gratitude.

I'm sorry that you've chosen this path.

I'm sorry that you think down south more than you do north

I'm sorry that you've discarded a chance to escape your depraved past

I'm sorry that you've turned your back on a stipulation-free friendship.

.... and I'm glad that I've saved my friend from such a disgusting animal like you.

P.S

To you,

You're hanging on a very delicate thread.... and Mansoura's been very windy lately, don't you think?