Monday, September 7, 2009

Nazeera's Guide to Ignorance and Stupidity.

Hello,
If you had attended the protest at Seksyen 22 Shah Alam, you've come to the right place.

This is a special post is dedicated to the very essense that leads to the destruction of everything mankinds holds near and dear.

Ignorance and Stupidity.

I will be writing a step by step guide on how to become an elite group of pure idiocracy and insensitivity.

Now, you silly protestors, read closely and slowly, I'm scared you might lose your way through my eloquent words.
There's no shame in reading it twice... or another twenty times.

We're not judgemental like you :).


Nazeera's Official Guide to
Ignorance
and
Stupidity


Step 1.

Take a cow's ( means LEMBU, if I'm going too fast, do read it again) head as shown and sever it off.
You can purchase one at your local market for few ringgit and you can save one after Raya Korban.
Warning, the latter might accumulate some rather interesting smells and textures after being kept for so long.

Step 2.

Find an issue that has NOTHING to do with you.

Nothing at all.

I'll give you an example, let's say...

The building of a Hindu temple in a Malay populated area.

But hey, that's just my suggestion.

Step 3.



Express yourself. Go crazy. Let yourself go.

Hey, forget about human rights!

Oh, just kick "racial sensitivity" the curb,

Tell yourself "SCREW ALL THE EFFORT WE MADE TO MEND RACIAL RELATIONS",

Keep on shouting "KAMI CABAR *insert name of who's causing you all this distress*

.......

Oh, and of course.

Spit and kick the cow's head you had oh-so-diligently brought :).



Step 4.

March down a populated road to show that you are taking a stand for this thing that you are so passionate about.

Call the media, what's a protest without a little attention eh?

State to them your purpose of having this protest*which again has NOTHING to do with you and will not bother you in any way possible*

And blame your insolence and anguish on the MP's in your area.

Cause hey, they didn't do what you wanted them for you, right Your Majesty?


Step 5.


...And if the media starts asking questions like

"Kenapa bawak kepala lembu ini?"..

Deny, deny, DENY!

But hey, it's not YOUR fault. Right?

I mean...

The big bad government people had to built a place of worship for another religion and despite the incessant complaints we have filed, they're still not budging.

Desperate times calls for desperate measures right?

Blame them! Never admit guilt!

Cause you know, you guys are just normal people protesting with a cow's head with obvious knowledge that the cow's a sacred animal to the Hindus.

But again, not your fault :).

Step 6.

Watch the country crumbling down slowly into an oblivion of derelict and disaster.

...................................................

That is all.

Hope you enjoyed the step by step guide to IGNORANCBoldE and STUPIDITY.

I shall stop here.

No need to unnecessarily exhaust the brains for the transformed followers of these steps :)