My first (not quite) Oscar!

Here are some rules to accept the award:

Thank and link the person who gave you the award.
Pass this award to 15 bloggers you recently discovered.
Contact the blogger and tell them they've won the award.
State seven things about yourself.

I was tagged by Kak Nadia!
I haven't done one of these things in a while, so I'm pretty stoked do the whole "Things You Should Know/Never Knew About Me" list.

Another chance to brag about/embarrass myself. Yippee.

7 Things
You Never Knew About Me/Should Know About Me/Already Knew But Forgotten About Me/Better Know or Else...

Number One.
I am only child. Never had siblings. I guess I'm pretty well adjusted to the solitude and lack of people around. But hey, I like my little family.

Number Two.
I know several iconic dances. Not iconic per say, just really popular ones, however shitty they might be. This includes:

• Soulja Boy
• Thriller
• YMCA
• The Chicken Dance

Throw a party and I'll show you what I can thrown on the dance floor baby ;)

Number Three
I like partying. 'Nuff said.

Number Four
I once stole a story book from a book fair in my school when I was seven. I think I still have it somewhere at home.

Number Five
I write poetry. It's rather difficult to comprehend someone as boisterous and obnoxious as me has the soul of a poet, but hey, Bush was president, anything is possible.

Number Six
I have a rather diverse and eclectic taste in music. It ranges from the Beatles to Coldplay, from Josh Groban to Stereophonics, from Eric Clapton to Lady Gaga. As long as it has lyrical and musical value, I'll listen to it.

Number Seven
This is a real honest one. Even if I'm a Muslim girl, I have trouble accepting the whole "women are the weaker sex" thing everyone is trying to impose onto me. It's a rather difficult concept to grasp, that women cannot be leaders, having to be almost subservient to men. It's a debatable topic but what I believe in, yes, we have different responsibilities but in the matters where women are just as competent as men, I don't see a reason why women should be brushed off as the more inept gender.

I'm done :)

Okay, I don't know 15 bloggers BUT I'm just gonna tag those whom I know haven't received this award.

Picka
Mun'aim
Fikri Prastanta
Mastura Mat Yasim
Dora Yaacob
Aliza

Till the time wasting update.
See you!

Friends Say the Darndest Things.

Hello all.

To follow up the blogging marathon that I'm on right now, I've decided to post another non-angry post to ease the tension of the "slander" and "anonymous" blogging fiasco that's happening right now.

I swear to God, I have some of the funniest friends... ever.

Well, these are the some of the things we say that we'll burst into laughter mid conversation.

Conversation 1

*talking about doing good towards our parents*

NB: Tu la, sementara mereka ada...
*cutting in*
AAR:... Mintaklah duit dari mereka.

translation:

NB: That's why, while they're still alive...
*cutting in*
AAR: Ask them for money.

Conversation 2

*talking about how popular our Egyptian friend AR is on Facebook*

NN: Yeah, all the girls love Amr.
ST: *imitating a girl* Oh Amr, marry me or I'll commit suicide, you have 30 seconds
NN: ... Posted one hour ago.

Conversation 3

FAA: Tu la, family die nak Sharifah.
MF: Aah, Sharifah selalunya hidung mancung.
FAA: Kurang ajar kan?
MF: ... Dan putih.

translation:

FAA: Exactly, his family wants a Sharifah
MF: Yeah, Sharifah's have sharp noses
FAA: You're being an ass...
MF: ... and fair.

Conversation 4

ST: He has another girlfriend
NN: Ugly people are not allowed to cheat! EVER!

Conversation 5

*about the recent commotion about the photos in the blog*

AAR: Hek ele, emo macam gambar die je yang masuk!
MF: Hey, mata aku nampak SIKIT okay!

translation:

AAR: She's being all pissed off like her photo was up in the blog as well!
MF: Hey, you could see my eyes okay!


Conversation 6

AYF: Hey, say hi to her for me, will ya? *pauses* How gay does that sound?
NN: I've accepted your pseudohomo a long time ago.

Conversation 7

MEM: I tried looking for that song, "Times goes by so slowly" by Madonna but I can't find it anywhere!
ST: It's called Hung Up.

Conversation 8

AA: Kita kena buat apa kita suka untuk relax.
FHR: Abang Amin, saya kan ada problem. Kalau saya tension, saya makan, lepas saya makan, saya tengok saya gemuk lagi, saya lagi naik tension.
AA: Perlu ke bagitau?

translation:

AA: We have to do the things we like to relax.
FHR: Abang Amin, I have a problem. When I'm stressed, I eat. When I see I've grown fatter, I get even more stressed.
AA: Was it necessary to tell everyone?

Conversation 9

*talking about the Jonas Brothers*

OEN: Eww, fcukin faggots.
NN: God doesn't love you enough to make you a Jonas Brother.

Conversation 10

*comments on a picture where PW has a zit*

MS: Jerawat!
PW: Annoying Mye! Macam dajal mata tiga!

translation:

MS: PIMPLE!
PW: Mye, you're annoying! Like a three eyed Antichrist.

Ten for now, until I can think up of some more!

See ya :)

Boyzone, how I miss you.

I'm gonna be stoned for apostasy for these pictures.

But I'm trying out a new concept of:

Less words, more pictures!

Anyway, there are a few things I would like to address.

Numero uno:
Why music was created in the first place:



This song is called Layla by Eric Clapton. Granted, it might not fit everyone's taste of music. Some people adore the whole "boyband" phase thing that seemed to have fleeted away as quickly as their boyish good looks

Exhibit A

Becomes...

... And the cute little gay one is dead.

Also, given the fact that I grew up listening to a lot 70's and 80's rock, blues and RnB... oh, and Michael Jackson.

My mum loved MJ

She even had those ancient black frisbees of Off The Wall and Thriller. And yes, she even had the cassettes *Oh, how I loved to pull out the flimsy films out*

As I was saying, I grew up loving these kind of crap so naturally, Eric Clapton was THE man. We had the The Clapton Chronicles album that never left the car until I stole it and ripped it into my computer.

Man, that was an incredible album.

It was the first time I heard Layla, which I read from trusty ol' Wikipedia that he was talking about George Harrison's wife that he was madly in love with.

Pattie Boyd.

It's difficult to imagine that name with that face.

Maybe, cause another certain singer who has a similar name *hint* Susan BOYle *hint* has totally tarnished my association of that name with something remotely attractive. Heh.

In conclusion, take a listen, and be ready for an out of this world, cosmic journey of musical adventure. Remember to hold on to something before you embark on this mind blowing experience.

Adios.

Numero dos.

There's been some fire that's blazing about the whole Info Kini blog that had bash the whole GMMSC Dinner that we all thought was a good first try despite having no prior experience in conducting something so elaborate and grandiose. Congratulations to you guys.

I have only one thing to say to you disgusting cowardly author on Info Kini who's attempts at being funny just fails repeatedly.Enough said.

I'm not gonna waste my time posting comments/statuses on FB cause I know this is what you craved for in the first place.

Publicity.

Come out from the shadows and then we'll talk.

From a door preferably, cause I'm scared that you'll be turned on by my feminine voice that can cause you to commit unimaginable sins.

Oh, how you people are sick.

Numero Tres

Oh, Manchester United.

:(

Numero cuatro

We have possibly found a house. It's about 1000 square feet, 1400 a month. But no furniture.

Oh, the possibilities of crap I plan to buy are endless.

... this is the time where a certain superior power *cough* parent *cough* is suppose to offer me more money to buy more things to alleviate my poverty stricken life.

Thank you :)

P-P-Poker Face.

Today, so far... is not a good day.

I woke up this morning with the most overwhelming feeling of lethargy and malaise that just makes that little voice that lies deep in the core of your soul whisper...

Today is gonna be the first of the many days that you feel like you're gonna kill yourself but you can't cause

a) It contradicts with religion
b) You're the only child, so there's no substitute
c) You're just being melodramatic, so shut up and pull yourself together, woman!

Yes, even my inner voice is a bitch.

Anyway, due to my superb track record of updating my lblog, I probably did not mention anything about:
a) Exams
b) Talent Show
c) The embarrassing outcome of the aforementioned talent show.

Exams are around the corner, 12th of April to exact. Eleven more days and counting! I gotta pass this semester cause I seriously do not want to to stay for the summer. Why? Cause the longer I stay here, the more I'm reminded why I miss Malaysia, my family, my friends and yes, even the nosy relatives I have back home.

Note to nosy relative:
I'm sorry your son couldn't get into medical school with his 7A's and I got into one with 5A's, but hey, I can't depend on the government for everything.

So, if your son wanted a scholarship into medical school, didn't get one and so gave up his dream, suck it up and don't gripe about how I'm paying my way through.

Don't worry, the government gave up on me as well.

Talent Show!

Gah, pictures are popping out left and right from that ominous day, including infinite photos of me in now what's called "The Joker" lipstick, my Lady Gaga shades, and my big ass grin that took up the majority of the space on my face.

Oh, the shame, the absolute shame.

We got third by the way. The first was Timi's band, Rubu' Firah (literally means 1/4 Chicken), second was Jaja's band *who has an ah-may-zing voice btw* The Duo and coming in third, is me! Or my band, Malayzee Bas (means, Only Malaysians).

My friends, Hajar and Fatin were on keyboards and guitar respectively while Pika was the other vocalist. Oh, and like three bands shared the same drummer, Aniq. Seriously, you guys rock! And sorry for being overly bossy during practice sessions. I just wanted everyone to do their best :)

I sang a medley of Thinking of You, Poker Face and I Will Survive.

Man, that last song really got the crowd going. I'm not surprised after this, I'll be on PCM's watch list for committing "maksiat" of the highest degree. Even Dr. Dalia came up to me and said she wanted to dance along but couldn't for obvious reasons. So yeah, I made our Head Tutor want to dance, I should be given a Grammy... or at least money. I like money

Pika on the other hand sang Down by Jay Sean. The crowd even sang along with her, which was incredible. And all that weird dancing was caught on tape! Oh, I smell blackmail material in the air.

So it's official baby, we were born for the stage.

... And the operating room of course.
I keep forgetting we're gonna be doctors.

But at the end of the day, I made new friends and definitely some confidence even if my face was hidden behind the a stretch of red paint. I'd do it again next year, definitely.

Anyway, I gotta get going. Shower, then I'm gonna hit the books. See you when I see you.

Diet.

I'm going on a diet.

... A SERIOUS ONE THIS TIME.

What made me realize this was the fact...."dude, it's already 2010. I'm 20 this year" Suddenly I'm reminded of wedding bells and lifelong commitment.

I want a man, damnit!

This goes against every feminist principle I have ever. Forgive me fighters for women's liberation.

Everybody in this house has a boyfriend. Every-damn-one.

... About 10-11 pm at night, when I'm studying like a nutjob, they're on the phone with their respective loved ones.

... Before an exam, they get encouragement from their boys while all I get is a phone call from my parents telling me not to screw up or to the streets I'll go.

... If they have problems, they have someone to tell them to. Any minuscule little detail that goes in their mind. I on the other hand have a friends who are too far away for me to burden my problems on them.

Dude, I want all that too!

Valentines gifts...
Handholding when I'm in a crowd *even if I'm like a foot taller than most people*...
Those"Blair and Chuck" moments that all those moronic couples are chasing after *it's a bloody TV show,people!*...
Someone to actually makes an effort when chatting.

Damn, I want all of that.

Gah, enough soul spilling already. Daddy, don't EVER bring this up. I'm your only daughter child and your happiness depends on my happiness. Thank you.

And to anyone who reads this, if you see me snacking or having a heavy lunch/dinner.

Tell me to drop the meal and stop!

It's time I change my life for the better.

*edit*
I'm in the FINALS people.
For the Talent Show and the GMNSC Photography competition.
Go see the final photos at the GMNSC blog

London Baby!

Holy mother of SpongeBob.

I'm actually gonna go to London.

Yes, it dawned upon me after years of whining to my mum about how we never go anywhere except balik kampung and "merapatkan silaturahim" with the Pilah folks, she finally budged from her mingy ways and we're final-damn-ly going on a holiday.

Yipee!

Miracles do come true.

I'm currently listening to Free Fallin' from John Mayer, staring at a McVitie's biscuit package, staring at the soon-to-break-down heater, counting the number of clothes hangers I have, wondering why chocolate tastes so good and yet it kills your chances of ever getting a man

... generally procrastinating from packing.

But me being me, I always have a solid, concrete reason why I have not progressed onto the next step of travelling:

a) It's too damn cold
b) It's too bloody cold
c) It's too mindblowingly cold
d) It's just extremely hot cold.

So, here I am, blogging.

I have a plethora of things I wanna do when I reach there. So many, just simply too many.

England To Do List '10

One

Souvenirs, souvenirs, souvenirs: The cheaper, the better. I'm still half Chinese after all

Two
Old Trafford: Glory glory biatch!

Three
Stamford Bridge or Emirates Stadium: Just to catch a glimpse of John Terry/Theo Walcott. Football rivalry or not, I'll take them on, anytime.

Four
Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum: I've been there actually, I want to relive the execution by guillotine exhibition again. Gore is beauty.

Five
Harrods: Sushi, sushi, sushi... and Princess Diana's memorial

Six
Err... kabobs?

Seven

Paris: We're just doing the French government a favour by using their Eurostar services. The phrase "let's not shop" shall not escape the dance of our lips. And mummy... nak beg baru :)

Eight
British food: I wanna see what's all the rage about a full English breakfast. If I get food poisoning, await my lawyer's letter, Gordon Brown.

Nine
Stereophonic's Greatest Hits: It will be like raising a toast with the Holy Grail. This elusive CD had me chasing it from Kuala Lumpur to Cairo. It was a transcontinental search that will end with victory and valor in London, when I see the white cover staring me in the face at Virgin, insyaAllah.

Ten
Friends inhabiting the island: I actually made some minor plans with a friend to meet up in London. I haven't seen him in about 3 years and I'm pretty excited about it. Abscence makes the heart grow fonder and way more expectant of gifts when she reaches there. Hint hint.

I'm growing sleepy and restless. An hour or two of sleep, breakfast, and then off to Cairo for a 9.30 am flight the next morning.

Pray for my safety and God bless.
Au revoir Mansoura.

M.Y.O.F.B

I've written exactly two posts in January. Compared to a certain housemate who has written over 40+ posts in those 31 days.

Shame on you, Nazeera.

I really need some diligence to write sustain this still on life support blog before it fades into oblivion.

Anyway, onto more pressing matters. Tomorrow is the OSCE exam. Last year, it was about the Upper Limb and Lower Limb, identifying muscles on the exam sheet, with this one very frivolous looking 50-something, Egyptian who couldn't keep his wandering eyes and toothless grin to himself.

I remember being so nervous, that to a point, I even got confused between a sperm and an ovum *hint* they're not from the same , genitalia *hint*. Oh, of course, how I wanted to jump off a building after that exam. But knowing this place, I'll probably fall onto a heap of donkey crap and survive.

Oh, damn.

*Again, just a joke, I do not condone suicide :)*

And on the 6th, I'm flying to London, insyaAllah. I'm rather excited to see my parents again after almost 4 months and visiting London again. The first time was when I was 12, during the Golden Jubilee. I remember ransacking Tesco for having prepackaged frosted cakes, paying 5 pounds for a plate of friend noodles, having sushi in Harrods and getting deliberately ignored at a bloody kabob stall for not having an English accent by a South Asian man.

I would like to say Mr. Person-Who-Came-From-The-Same-Continent-As-Me selling dry to the bone shawarmas at the kabob stall

...screw you

Your shawarma tasted like crap and you look like you should be stopped at the airport.

Anyway, in a not-as-productive-as-I-wanted-day, I had a very annoying encounter with a rather grotesque person who shall be named Pak Geham (Pak Cik Geli Macam Haram). I was studying with my friend in her room and while on a break, we were fooling around with the webcam. Suddenly, Pak Geham acquired about me, like I was some mail order bride, vulgarity in it's full glory.

" What is her height and weight?"

He asked my housemate. I was trying to be a sport and ignore the obvious cyber harassment but he continued with...

" Obese la tu"

Stop, right there, asshole.

Pak Geham went on further of insinuating I was this dumbass that didn't have an ounce of intelligence in my brain, unqualified to speak of religion and social indecencies and was incapable of conversing in English *the dumbass said he got a 97 for his English SPM, which tells us how old this revolting piece of turd really is*

I'm sorry for not entertaining your pathetic attempt at impressing me,Pak Geham but I only bat an eyelash for people who do not come from scum of the earth. You probably got a scholarship, learned fcking English from a browning, second hand Oxford dictionary, made a small fortune from kissing government officers asses and for that, you think you have the world at the palm of your hand and that you are God's gift to women.

Thanks but not thanks Pak Geham. I like men who are not complete brainless charity cases of the government and you sir unfortunately fall into that category. Instead of wishing you death, I'm just gonna go for the subtle...

I hope you get anally raped by a gang of homosexual hobos who share needles and have a fetish of gluing their victim's scrotum during intercourse

I'm sorry my obese self has polluted your spectrum of beautiful women that seem to be undeniably attracted to you *your mother and your insufferable wife do not count*. Please, snap out of your self centered fantasy and understand that you are nothing but dirt under my shoes. Worthless, shameless, brainless, disgusting and utterly wretched.

You don't know who you're dealing with.

Not a bad post for a girl who didn't get 97 in her English SPM eh?